That May Cost You This Evening

"I'm at work, she's not my wife." - Teacher discussing a fellow teacher who actually is his wife.

On The Effects OF Religion

"I have four children.... it was my Catholic period." - Educational consultant

On Reasons For Teaching High School

"I thought of teaching small children, but I found small children generally repugnant" - Educational Consultant

New Term - Cropdusting

Cropdusting = Farting while walking

Example: "I just did some cropdusting back there" - Teacher

Honesty

"I never danced with my butt up on other people like that." - Teacher 1

"I did" - Teacher 2

On Peewee Herman

"He was caught working out in the theater." - Teacher

What Kind Of Friend Are You?

"Do you want the friend truth or the TRUTH" - Student discussing her friend's boyfriend

You Have My Undivided Attention

"My best friend kinda, almost burned down her house the other day." - Student

They Make Those?

Answer on a test.

Question: Discuss methods for reducing energy consumption in transportation.

Answer: Drive cars that don't rely on energy.

Not Something You Want To Hear In The Bathroom

"That was an explosive lunch" - Teacher

Thanks for Sharing

"Can I go to the bathroom? I have to pee like a pregnant woman." - Student

That's Not Good

"Stop touching her innappropriately" - Teacher to student

"I was just showing her what my teacher does" - Student